Homeboken

Get out from under the sofa, peeps... GA's back!

C'mon, you can't stay down there forever.  You like it there? Then come out for a few minutes so I can tell you about my week in the woods of Harriman State Park.

First, a BIG THANK-YOU to GA's babysitter, One-Eye. 

He did a magnificent job feeding the baby, changing its nappies, and burping it.  Boy, that cyclops does more with one damned eyeball than most can do with two.   Knowing One-Eye was at GA's helm let me sleep soundly at night.  Or else it was the whiskey highballs.

One-Eye, you can blog here anytime. Especially since you have my Blogger log-in. In fact, I'll bet you're combing through my GA email account right now, looking for salacious communications with City Hall- maybe an edgy knock-knock joke or a subversive recipe for banana muffins...something to read at the next City Council meeting and pass to Hoboken411 for publication. Gotcha, GA!

Or did I confuse you with Beth Mason?   But she's got Two-Eyes...

Um, where was I?

Oh, yes!  So the Avenger crew spent last week upstate, sans gizmo and wireless signal (no texting- aaaargh!), in a cabin in the woods with a lake and savage, man-eating deer roaming freely about.

Don't they look fierce?

I approached these fauns like a ninja... one false move and I'd have been Bambi's breakfast.

And more dangers lay ahead.

Blueberries, for instance. Wild ones. We picked them...

...only because we answered the riddle of the Guardian spider.

Q: What goes on four legs in the morning, on two legs at noon, and on three legs in the evening?

A: A man, who crawls on all fours as a baby, walks on two legs as an adult, and walks with a cane in old age.

That was also the Riddle of the Sphinx, who sat outside of Thebes and queried all travelers who passed; it was answered by Oedipus a few thousand years ago and LA (Little Avenger) last Monday.

There were more horrors ahead. Raging, roaring, out-of-control fires, spitting hot ash and smoke into the air.

... devouring everything in their path.

This nature-stuff got so unnerving  we sought refuge in a safe place.

Our shelter was comforting and familiar, with all the provisions one could wish for and plastic bags to carry them in.

They wouldn't let us pitch tents in the Bakery.  Would Frozen Foods would have been better?  It was back to the woods.

Morning walks.

Fishing.

Taming wild beasts.

 Dancing.

 GA passed this speed-walker every morning, and admired the hop and bounce in her step. So one day I danced at her, and she danced back... from then on we'd both start dancing at each other on sight

She's 64 years old!!! 

Roasting on the beach.

My dear Miss Bossy Boots, called me "brave" for "bathing in two pieces".   No, MBB.  I just don't give a damn. We all get old and flabby.  So what.  Btw, I  miss you, dear MBB.  You are very special to me.  

Last but  not least,  I finally read Who's Sorry Now, Joe "Joey Pants" Panoliano's memoir about growing up in Hoboken. A  friend of this blog thought I needed to learn more about so-called 'old guard' culture and their moral universe.  

Have you read it?

It's very entertaining; a fun read with some familiar names- like the thinly-disguised 'Poupie Rea'.  Yes, those two were in the same class at one time. Little Joey Pants' parents were constantly moving (10 times in all) so each chapter is named after one of his addresses: 701 Adams Street, 202 Monroe Street, 503 Madison Street, 310 Jackson Street, and so on.

While the book was indeed a snapshot in time of Hoboken's Italian-American  culture of the mid-20th century, it read like a love story.  From a boy to his mother, father, second father, extended family and neighborhood. His mom was an extraordinary character; 'sweetheart' and f*ck-face' were interchangeable endearments, and she loved him fiercely, loudly, colorfully.  Some of it had me laughing out loud. Do check it out if you haven't yet.

Okay, so we made it through a rough week- vicious animals, fires, spiders and blueberries-  with a short respite in a fluorescent -lit haven.



Did GA ever mention the JibJab boys are cousins?  Yes, it's true but don't hold  that against them.

Well, now it's time to catch up on what I missed here at Homeboken.  Did I miss anything?