Wednesday, July 23, 2014

"It may be BIG, but it's still a LIZARD."



It's BIG, alright!   

But, the Japanese soldier who uttered that line in last night's showing of  "Godzilla vs. Megaguirus," was right:  "It may be BIG, but it's still a LIZARD."

(Okay, he said it 3 seconds before he got squashed under a giant lizard-foot, but those words resonated with GA so I jotted them down.) 

GA loves that line; a variant of 'the bigger they are, the harder they fall,' only funnier.

It has it's application right here in Hoboken, where giant lizards walk amongst us, wreaking havoc not with fiery breath, but with checkbooks.


Here's how Godzilla was dispatched last night: with  an experimental satellite-based weapon that fires miniature black holes!  WOW!

(But no explanation for what happened to the teeny, matter-eating  black holes after they swallowed their targets. )

Battling Hoboken's Checkzilla is not that simple. Unlike ToHo's lizard, this one attracts the most debased reptilian-human hybrids who feed off the checkbook which somehow makes them believe they are invincible.

Are they?

The movie's not over!

In Godzilla vs. Megaguirus human qualities of intelligence and creativity conquered the creature; those are things that money can't buy.

Good and evil forces in ToHo movies are easy to spot: has it got scales?  BAD.  Does it wear shoes?  GOOD.   In Hoboken, our beast gets plenty of help. So, while endings here not as predictable as those in ToHo movies, remember the words of that brave Japanese soldier before he got flattened like a tortilla:

"It may be BIG, but it's still a LIZARD."

3 comments:

  1. I'd like to boink the living crap out of checkzilla's checkbook. There's a bunch of us who will SLAPP back Checkzilla silly. You just wait bitch. When you least expect it, expect it.

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  2. Is Checkzilla gone from Hoboken politics in 2015?

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    Replies
    1. can't come soon enough, anon. need a good candidate to go against her, we should start thinking about it now.

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